Well. It’s been a very long time since I’ve sat and written a blog… and I’m not even sure where I want to go with this one because it isn’t a ‘story’ really.

I will probably have more stories to tell as time goes on. But I can barely remember where I left off and what I thought I wanted to tell. I just checked and my last blog was so fluff – a Fútbol game for goodness sake!

So I’ll do this blog from my heart – from Today’s perspective.

I’m sad.
No use denying it.

It has been extremely difficult for me to be here in Iowa. Maybe it’s not difficult to BE HERE per se… but more difficult to not BE THERE.

Do you see the difference?

I don’t even know how many of you are still checking on occasion. I’ve heard a few complaints about my lack of writing – but they are the random few who also have such a strong emotional tie to the people and the work in El Salvador. So their complaints do not surprise me.

I’m not even sure what to write right now. I’ve been really busy since I’ve returned. I flew in Thursday night the 20th of March - getting home after 10:30 p.m. And knowing I had to get on an airplane the very next morning, I had to get some laundry done (but you all know that is an easy prospect here… I have a MACHINE to do it for me so I just dumped it all in!!)

I was out the house by 7:30 a.m. the very next morning and on my way to Atlanta for my niece’s wedding. This was a lovely event held at the Atlanta Zoo in the pavilion near the warthogs. (I love the whole concept of this location!!!). And it truly was a beautiful wedding. Short, sweet, casual yet elegant … warm and loving.

Dave and I had the next day to explore Atlanta – but being Easter Sunday – not a whole heck of a lot was open. We ended up at Stone Mountain. Check it out on line. It was very cool.

We got home Monday afternoon on the 24th. That was the day that I was ‘technically’ home. It’s been a struggle. I would be lying if I said differently.

There are so many things I miss about El Salvador. The people. The work. The smells. The language. The humbleness. The people. The work. The simplicity.

I’ve had lots to keep me busy here. My Don Justo volunteers were wonderful – but they did things a little differently than me. So I’ve been compiling papers, files, etc. to how I used to do it… that has been a great distraction. But really – Betty and Ann did such a good job of it all, that I really didn’t have too much to do.

I’ve had Compañeros reports to write. I’ve had unpacking to do. I’ve been going through closets and ‘down-sizing’ things. Every time I come back from El Sal I get an urge to simplify and so I try to take advantage of that down-sizing energy.

I’ve visited sister, mom, mom-in-law, friends, church people, coffee contacts and countless others. My time has been full here in Iowa but my heart has been a bit empty.

I know I will be going back to El Salvador. But it won’t be in the capacity that I was working these past few months so it will be VERY different. Every trip will be special of course – that is a given. And now – they will be even more special because of the more personal relationships I have formed with not only the Pastoral Team, but also with the members of the 17 cantons and many people in the pueblo of Berlin… so my returns will be very sweet. I will need to tack on several days before and after any delegation visits I make just so I can devote time to talking to people without being rude to my delegation!.

I already know I get to go back in June. We have a brand new church that has formed a delegation. The Compañeros group decided that it was really important for this new potential partner to have a ‘for real guide’ in the process – and I (of course) offered my services to accompany this group – and Compañeros – bless their collective souls – offered to pay my way to accompany this group. I am so happy I get to do this. I am so grateful to Compañeros for making this possible (I could not afford it on my own). And obviously, I am so very happy to be returning so soon.

God only knows what is in store for me in the future. I am trying to keep my faith – that God will put me where I need to be … Somehow, I feel my future is in El Salvador. I would really like a ‘billboard from God’ - telling me where He wants me to be. If it is here – so be it. I will work my heart and soul for the people in El Salvador. If I am supposed to be in El Salvador … well – I will make it work out somehow. But truly… a billboard would be nice. I’m not good with subtleties!!

I’m not sure what else to write right now so this is it for now.

I’ll try to do more writing for you about the last few weeks in El Sal. I’ll think back to the very cool and interesting things that happened and try to come up with thematic stories for you.

So if you are still checking… don’t give up hope for more blog entries. Check once a week at this point…

And I do need to say: thank you for your faithful reading. It did my heart good (and very much surprised me) to see how many “hits” I had on my blogs each day.

The blogs were a great way to journal and in many ways were very therapeutic for me. So thanks for the cheap counseling sessions! I would recommend blogs to anyone who is experiencing struggles – both joyful or heart wrenching.

Or if not a public journal… consider a private journal. There I great comfort in getting things ‘off your chest’ and onto paper (or electronics) is a good venue for venting.

Blessings to you all.
And truly – you have NO idea how gratifying it has been for me to see how many ‘hits’ I have had on my blog site. Very amazing and humbling. I hope I have entertained or enlightened you – whatever your Salvadoran needs have been …

Thank you for your faithful readings and occasional comments. (side note: comments are great to hear… so TALK to me!!)

Love and affection to all of you.
And here is a promise to you all… I’ll find more to tell you in the coming weeks.
; o)

True to his word, Jorge swung by Berlín on his way home from San Salvador. His wife and two sons (Jorge 12-ish and Diego 10-ish) were with him.

Of course, we were running late – we needed to be in San Miguel by 5 and it was about 4:30 when we left La Casa. It takes me about 15 or 20 minutes to drive down the mountain to Mercedes Umaña then another 35 minutes to get to San Miguel. Not Jorge! Holy buckets! I’m a pretty calm passenger for the most part… I’ve been in an Italian taxi for goodness sake – but I had to shut my eyes a few times as we passed trucks and buses on the mountainous curves. They ALL got a kick out of that. The wife and kids didn’t bat an eyelash. So now I have more things to razz Jorge about. He has such a fun sense of humor (he speaks English) and has an infectious laugh so I love to joke around with him…

Since I’m writing this a week after the game, obviously we made it to San Miguel. They dropped me off at the Tropico Inn where I would spend the night – the New York Rotarians were there as well so I will got to have breakfast with them in the morning. Jorge went home to drop off his wife and then returned with the kids. Miguel (another Rotarian) swung by with another vehicle and we all loaded up to head to the game. We were 5 kids, Jorge, Miguel, me and the 4 New York folks in 2 cars. When we got to the stadium, there were several more San Miguel Rotarians already there. These guys have clout – they were allowed to park in private and secure spots right at the entrance. I was the only one not wearing orange… no one had told me – well the New York folks had talked about the game and the orange shirts they got cheap, but I just didn’t make the connection. Wouldn’t have mattered… I don’t have an orange shirt anyway. I was lucky because right outside the gate, there was a vendor. I decided to suck it up and pay the stadium price for a shirt. Ok. I should remember I’m in El Salvador. I got a really cool team shirt for $5. It’s a great souvenir and now I won’t stand out like a sore thumb. I do that enough as it is! So I slipped it over my tank top – but I could already tell I was going to swelter… so I asked if I could change really fast in Jorge’s car… we trundled back while the others bought the tickets. Jorge unlocked the car, I got in, he walked away and turned his back and I tried to be discreet – but between being sweaty, and the tight-ish tank top, and the not too big orange shirt over that, I couldn’t wiggle out of one while keeping the other one on… so I took a quick look around – no one was really in sight and just as fast as I could did the shirt switch. Heck… no one knows me… I’ll never see them again, right?? I keep telling myself that.

We caught up to the rest of the crowd ready to go into the stadium. Stephanie had bought my ticket. That was really nice of her!!! We were there by 5:15 and the game wouldn’t’ start till 7 p.m. but it is first come first served seating. And we all ended up at the 50 yard line. Dead center – maybe 10 rows up. Wow. It could not have been better. There were probably 25 or 30 of us by the time the game started. More Rotarians kept showing up. It was very festive. There was lots of beer ($1 a glass – yup – the same size as the $5 cup at the minor league baseball stadium in Des Moines) and vendors selling the usual Salvadoran munchies. I bought some platano chips … Jorge gave me a look of panic – saying to me: ‘What are you going to do with those??” I gave him a goofy look and said “I’m gonna eat them!” He said – “oh, no… you shouldn’t… it’s not safe” “Oh good grief” I say… “I eat them all the time… I love them! What’s wrong with them? They’re cooked!” He says “The flies… they are left out and the flies are all over them.” “Oh yeah. Oh well.” Crunch, crunch. “You want one?” “Yeah, thanks.” he says. Hence, continues our evening.

I got a few more “unsafe” munchies and we were on our way to a great evening.

Almost everyone in the stadium had orange on. I’m glad I bought my shirt.

We had a great time talking and greeting everyone before the game. Then the players came out to stretch. Oh la la. It must be a law that soccer players have to be really good looking.

Then the referees came out and they were more fun to watch than the players. They have their own warm-up routine which was almost like a dance! There were four of them prancing and doing all sorts of fun to watch moves – all in sync with each other.

Then the police came out – Lots of them in full gear including helmets, big boots and huge shields. They came out because the opposing team came out to do their warm-ups. Apparently, the crowds can get ugly.

But no one did so that was good. The cheap seat section had a HUGE banner that somehow they coordinated the flying of. I did get a pretty good picture of that. Then the fireworks started. Then the national anthem - fortunately, the short version. And then the kick off. Or whatever it’s called. And then the game began.

I know nothing of this game… other than you want the ball to go into the net. But it was really fun to watch anyway. I can’t believe the stamina of those players. They are on the field for two 45 minute periods. No time outs, no breaks. Unless you get hurt – then they take you off in a stretcher. One guy had to get his bleeding head bandaged, but he went right back out to play.

During the half time, Stephanie and I began to sing “take me out to the ballgame” but not very whole-heartedly. I asked one of the guys if he thought it would be ok if I went down to the fence to take pictures of the police… he said sure… so I did. In spite of the darkness of the night, I got some good close up shots of them, the green cross guys and our crowd of Rotarians.

Later Jorge told me the police chief asked if I was taking photos of the cops… he told him no. I could have gotten in big trouble apparently. Police fear for their safety here and can’t be photographed. Maybe I should blur out the faces when I post them to the gallery!!

The final score was 0 – 0. Technically the home team won because they started the game in the lead over the other team. So when it is a draw, the team ahead gets a point.

Afterwards, the tradition is to go to Pizza Hut. So we all did. Good thing, because I was hungry. Munchies and beer doesn’t sustain too well. Someone told the Pizza guys that it was Wayne’s (N.Y.) birthday and he was a great sport when they stuck a hat on his head and a balloon in his hand!

When we all had our fill of pizza, the 4 of us were driven back to the Tropico and we all made our way to our rooms. It was so quiet there. I missed my roosters and dogs and music next door, but I managed to sleep like a baby anyway.

But I want to fill in some gaps and I am writing as I think of things ... or as I run across my photo folders!!

Much time has passed since the St. Boniface group has come and gone but I have a lot of cool pictures that I want to share so I have to go back in time to explain a few of them…

From one of my past emails, you know we spent time in El Recreo – their sister canton… but we did more than just have a very long mass…

They also did home visits… breaking up into small groups and each group going with a translator to sit and chat with one family for about an hour. And they got to watch a bit of a soccer game and shared a meal with the community. Having supper with 400 friends is a real treat!

It’s different not being a part of a delegation … my role is a bit different now. The community knows me from my multiple visits there and when people come to Berlin to go to market or church … or come to La Casa for whatever reason so I’m not a stranger… but I’m also not a part of their sister church.

So our relationship is a bit different. It’s fun for me to see how the community rallies around the delegation – how they talk, laugh, and build friendships. Old timers are received as old friends… new delegates are accepted into the fold very quickly.

Another thing this delegation did was to visit the 3 marginalized schools in Berlin. These schools serve the poorest of the poor children in Berlin and get minimal support from the ministry of education… although, just within the last couple of years, the teachers have finally begun to get paid! They started out as volunteers as the cardboard communities on the fringes of Berlin sprung up after the last really big earthquake.

The delegation also likes to visit the local physical therapy clinic around the corner from La Casa. This place serves about 70 children – aged 3 to 17 – who come in for 2 one hour sessions each week. They have a variety of disabilities ranging from Down’s Syndrome to Club foot, Cerebral Palsy, arthritis, spinal problems, vision or hearing problems… you name it. There is a sliding scale fee but most don’t have to pay because they cannot afford it. It is a fabulous resource for the MANY handicapped children in this area. I’ve made many friends there amongst the children. And when they see me on the street, they come running for a full body slam hug! I love it. I will miss them a lot when I leave.

I also took the group up to the lagoon in Alegria for a bit of diversion. It is a unique thing to say you stood inside a volcano. We don’t have too many of those in Iowa… oh yeah. We don’t have any of those in Iowa!

It was a good week. The St. Boniface group was a blend of first timers and repeat visitors. I knew 6 of them before they came: Fr. Vince, Mike, Barb, Jerol, Jerry and Kami. The new ones were Ann, Lynn, Todd and Kathy.

One night, some of the delegates played UNO with some of the ladies of the Pastoral Team – talk about funny times! Loud and raucous … cheaters one and all! But all in fun and giggles.

One night I sat with Mike and his guitar and we sang around the kitchen table. I don’t know where everyone else was, but I really enjoyed that… I learned of a good website to find guitar chords set to the words of lots of music I know…

And a few nights we just sat and talked all night.

Needless to say… when a group is so nice and friendly and inclusive… I don’t get much work done!

But it’s worth it…

We were expecting a delegation of 4 from the New York Rotary Club on March 9th. They were only going to stay 2 nights. They are one of the organizations overseeing and supporting the Pure Water - Slow Sand Filters that we hope to have installed in every household on this mountain; bringing purified water to over 17,000 people! No small undertaking.

They wanted to visit the manufacturing facility in San Miguel and meet up with the Rotary International folks there. They have a strong club and have partnered with the New York clubs as well as the Pastoral Team and ProVida to make this dream a reality.,

So Otilia and I were invited to join all the Rotarians in San Miguel for a dinner meeting on the 6th. A woman from Pure Water for the World was going to be there to talk to us all and figure out some details. The Rotary Club said they would foot the bill for us to spend the night in the local hotel for our safety. It isn’t smart for two women to drive at night. So we agreed we would go. We would also get to interview another candidate for the ‘project coordinator’ job – someone who will oversee the entire project – from the sand used in manufacturing, to the installation and education in the homes, the parasite treatments at the end – and the ensuing follow up over the years.

We had the meeting at the hotel so it was easy to drive to and easy to stay put for the night.

And I finally met Stephanie and Tansukh whom I had been emailing over that past few months planning their time in Berlín.

Turns out that Stephanie and I are long lost sisters; we think a lot alike. She is goofy and fun but very committed to her humanitarian work. And this project is very important to her.

As it is to the San Miguel people, the rest of the N.Y. Rotarians and the Pastoral Team. So this was a great opportunity to all get together at the same time to work out some details. And it was a productive night. We did interview the candidate, but there were so many people there and it was only partially translated … and by two different people and sometimes simultaneously. I was sitting way at the end by 3 of the San Miguel guys who often were chatting amongst themselves so I didn’t hear much of the interview… But Otilia was sitting right next to the guy and that was the most important thing since she is the one who would be communicating with him the most.

I could see she wasn’t convinced that he was the man for the job. We had interviewed two others before him. And both of us really liked the first candidate who had several years experience with this project in Honduras and Otilia knows him and his work and has confidence in his commitment and his abilities to work with the people of the cantons. Only problem was, he wanted too much salary.

So we basically dismissed him as unreachable.

Until tonight… the candidate on this night also asked for more than was in the budget … and the Rotarians were all willing to make a compromise and offer him a package. And this salary package was similar to what that first guy wanted.

I could see Otilia’s face… but she wasn’t speaking up. So I got up, walked over and asked her what she thought… and as I thought I had read in her face, this was not the candidate she would have the most confidence in… and she sited many reasons why. Experience is one… not just in the technical end, but the experience of working with the people of the cantons who require a certain manner of communication…

So I found a way to get one of the New York Rotarians out into the hall to try to explain in a nut shell what was going on and the concerns Otilia had…

Long story short… after much confusion, many repeated conversations and questions and ponderings… it was decided to make the same offer to BOTH candidates and see what happened.

That was how the meeting ended basically.

Overall it was a good night. Otilia and I shared a room and it was like a mini-slumber party. After we were in our jimmies, she lay on her bed, and I lay on mine and we chatted for about 45 minutes. Talking more about our feelings of the evening and plans for the next day. She had errands to run.

She got up by 5:30 and told me to keep resting – she would be back after her errands and we could go home. She would be back in time for some breakfast before we left though.

I ended up getting out of bed by 6 anyway - missing a golden opportunity to sleep in a couple more hours. But the HOT shower was beckoning. I think I stayed in there for 20 minutes. It was deliciously hot and strong.

I took my book and walked out to the pool area which is where breakfast is served. I decided to just have coffee while I waited for the other Rotarians to roll out of their rooms. It was quite pleasant really. I read a little Stephen King… I started that book in October when I first got here… I’m only about a third of the way through. I just don’t have time to read for pleasure.

So between the hot shower and the reading … it was a lovely way to start the day!

At breakfast we all talked more about this and that – getting to know each other better. These New York folks are really nice. They told me they had a tradition of going to a soccer game while in San Miguel because it is raucously fun and wild. I have never been to one and said so… they suggested I join them. Jorge said he had to go to San Salvador the day of the game and he would swing by Berlín to pick me up and I would spend the night again in San Miguel. The next day, the New York folks were coming up to Berlín to spend two days with us, so I could just tag along with them to come back the next day.

I had a fun thing to look forward to!